Hi everyone.
Ever felt empty? No, broken is a better word. Lost two of my best friends in the last few months, well three actually. I had a fight with the third friend this evening. He loves me in a way I don't love him. This was fine with me, as long as I wouldn't hurt him. Well.. Today I was with him, with two friends more. A girl and a boy. The boy who loves me, is P. The girl is J. and the other boy was K. So. K. helped me cause I had some issues with my body today. P. got jealous and ignored him, sometimes he even was liverish. So P. don't want to accept my friends any more, cause he is jealous. That hurts... He says he loves me, that he'll do anything for me, but accepting my friends is too much? There isn't even something going on between me and K. Yeah, we give hugs. I really enjoy being with K., but so it was with P. With K. is better though, but that's because he isn't jealous, because I don't have to watch my words about activities with other friends(talking about day spending together...). With P. I always watched my words, just because I didn't want to make him uncomfortable. I may not love him the way he loves me, but he was pretty deep. Well, last night we had a little fight, we decided it's over. Three friends losing in short time.. It's not that I should undo things, well, maybe I shouldn't have been this hard on P. Now he's gone. Can't get him back again, he's gone. The first 15 minutes, I cried.. Really badly. Then, I decided to go and just walk around a little bit. Another friend of mine came to visit me, to comfort me. Sweet boy. But now. I don't feel anything any more. I feel like I'm emotionally broken. I know this probably sounds really depressed or something, but it is how I feel. Just empty or something. Can't really describe it. But whatever, we all have to continue our lives and find our final destination.. I'll see what happens next. Well, probably it's best to go to sleep now, it's 00:26 am over here. Good night everyone!
Love, Rose
Ever felt empty? No, broken is a better word. Lost two of my best friends in the last few months, well three actually. I had a fight with the third friend this evening. He loves me in a way I don't love him. This was fine with me, as long as I wouldn't hurt him. Well.. Today I was with him, with two friends more. A girl and a boy. The boy who loves me, is P. The girl is J. and the other boy was K. So. K. helped me cause I had some issues with my body today. P. got jealous and ignored him, sometimes he even was liverish. So P. don't want to accept my friends any more, cause he is jealous. That hurts... He says he loves me, that he'll do anything for me, but accepting my friends is too much? There isn't even something going on between me and K. Yeah, we give hugs. I really enjoy being with K., but so it was with P. With K. is better though, but that's because he isn't jealous, because I don't have to watch my words about activities with other friends(talking about day spending together...). With P. I always watched my words, just because I didn't want to make him uncomfortable. I may not love him the way he loves me, but he was pretty deep. Well, last night we had a little fight, we decided it's over. Three friends losing in short time.. It's not that I should undo things, well, maybe I shouldn't have been this hard on P. Now he's gone. Can't get him back again, he's gone. The first 15 minutes, I cried.. Really badly. Then, I decided to go and just walk around a little bit. Another friend of mine came to visit me, to comfort me. Sweet boy. But now. I don't feel anything any more. I feel like I'm emotionally broken. I know this probably sounds really depressed or something, but it is how I feel. Just empty or something. Can't really describe it. But whatever, we all have to continue our lives and find our final destination.. I'll see what happens next. Well, probably it's best to go to sleep now, it's 00:26 am over here. Good night everyone!
Love, Rose